Moving Forward and Backwards

I thought i could move on, i thought i was over all of this but everyday it gets harder to get up and force a smile when all i can think about is what went wrong and wish things couldve been different and wish that you cared or wonder if you ever cared the way you said you did you tore my heart out of my chest and im supposed to be just perfectly fine and happy when inside im crying wondering what happened to all the good times and wonder why you did the things you did to me i loved you wholeheartedly and truly and all you cared about was your own selfish thoughts you hurt the one person who would do anything for you and would stay by your side through it all and it hurts to say that you dont even care anymore you just dropped me like a toy when you were bored it hurts to say that its over i wish things were different than they are all i can do is keep moving forward maybe someday ill get over all of this but what hurts me the most is when i came to get my things you wouldnt even face me you tried to have me arrested i dont understand all of this but i guess im not meant to.